It takes years to discover ourselves, and even much more to understand the inner areas of others. Recently, there had been such coincidence in my friends’ lives, as well as mine. There’s the one who consistently showered care and concern to others, to a point where others began to take such acts of kindness as indicators of attraction. At the very end of the spectrum, there’s the other one who remained reticent, self-sufficient in their own world.

I’ve came to realize how badly things could get, to a point of saturation and helplessness. While we attempt to resolve things within our own limits, we tend to overlook the comfort our own God can provide.

A great deal is swarming through my head like a series of tempestuous thunderstorms. It wasn’t filled with matters of the heart any more, albeit they were the primary cause for the lack of focus for some of my university modules. I’m long past the stage of self-defeat and the search for answers. It’s over and I’m thankful glad.

There is so much uncertainty that lies ahead, some of which concerns work-related issues which I cannot express them in detail here. And confidence is draining out of me because I can’t understand the notations of simple mathematics.

This period of time is a road filled with multiple pit stops for self discovery. I can’t imagine meeting the expectations of the supercilious society and worse still, to end up groveling at the feet of these condescending individuals who gave up their hope on me.

I haven’t given up totally, it’s just that this continual issue concerning confidence has always been a disquiet ever since the start of university days.

I will make it, with hope and with faith.